♪ You better watch out, You better not cry, Better not pout, I’m telling you why: History is coming to town. ♪
These days, it’s not hard to make Santa’s “nice list,” especially with a spy, er, elf always looking over your shoulder. But in centuries past, the holiday season could bring worse fates than coal in your stocking.
Fortunately, Second Glance History has compiled the rules you didn’t know you needed to not only stay on Santa’s good side but keep yourself safe from rampaging reindeer and other Christmas catastrophes.
Horses and cattle in the German Alps are believed to possess the gift of speech upon Christmas Eve, but to play the eavesdropper upon them means death before the New Year.
According to an Alpine legend, a doubting servant once hid in his master’s barn loft upon a Christmas Eve to prove to his neighbours that they were fools to believe such trash.
Upon the stroke of twelve he heard a farm horse say, “We shall have hard work to do this day week.”
“Yes,” replied his mate, “the farmer’s servant is heavy, and the way to the churchyard is long and steep.”
The Birmingham postal authorities are embarrassed by an extraordinary number of Christmas messages and gifts, which, through insufficient addresses, have found their way to the dead letter department.
They include 12,000 Christmas cards, 30,00 letters, and 600 parcels. The last include a great variety of articles, ranging from false teeth and wooden legs to Devonshire cream and game in various degrees of freshness.
Señor Herrero, who won the second prize in a Christmas lottery, celebrated the occasion with a plate of oysters. The first oyster which he opened contained a large pearl. Señor Herrero hurried out and sold the pearl to a dealer for £100.
Meanwhile the bar was crowded with men and women clamoring to be served with oysters. The stock was quickly sold out and consumed, but as no pearls were found the disappointed customers wrecked the restaurant.
In remote country parts it is still believed that he or she who breaks mistletoe from a tree instead of cutting it will meet with an accident within Christmastide.
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Disclaimer: The modern era is far from the first to grapple with rampant “fake news.” As I am neither a historian nor journalist, I make no claims about the accuracy or lack thereof of the above sources. I assert only that they make for a good story.
Welcome to Second Glance History! This blog seeks to uncover the people and the stories forgotten by history and give them another read through a modern lens. Join me every week as we examine the differences that divide and the common threads that connect the then to the now.
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